2nd draft Shouting out into empty … better but …

SHOUTING INTO EMPTY

I’m trying to shout
alone
To shout out
 loud
But not one 
        faint echo ...
No
   sound to
reverberate or resonate or
  simply murmur
Shouting out 
loud  into empty 
Is not easy

words string out and float away
 away
away
bubbles, pipe-streamer
   bubbles, small, floating,
      spinning,
Trying to touch, to find,
seeking 
         infinity
Are YOU there
Are you
Somewhere out there 
lurking
 hiding in the shifting 
      space between

in the void 
that islands me, you behind screen and wire and
            wave?
Fingers tap tap tapping
         rhythms crying to be sung
I SHOUT my slow winged words, searching
        for the tune to flow them ...
Do you hear?
Does your hand
reach out to gently catch
them, to 
    capture them
As they drift, 

before they fade, 
             as they
die 
       in silence?
I shout myself
at you
I shout the form that shifts
       in the haze,
     that fades into time
That leaves
          no echo, 
               no trace
no 
    sound
When I shout out loud
into empty …

Published by

theedgealone

I am a 72 year old grandmother of 9, mother of 3, and happily married for almost 52 years. I was born in Sydney NSW, spent my first 43 years living there, but moved with our family to Tasmania in the mid 1980s seeking to leave behind Sydney's increasing madness. Following our usual gypsy pattern, we travelled around the state for some years, living in the North-West, the Midlands, the Central North, before finally settling well and truly in the beautiful Derwent Valley at Black Hills. It took just under 20 years of discovering Tasmania for us to finally came "home". I now live under wide skies with glorious views of the countryside, the hills and valleys of the Upper Derwent, approximately 50 minutes drive from Hobart and 20 minutes west of New Norfolk. Our home is high on an escarpment looking out to Mount Field, and as the photo shows, often wrapped in mist and floating on cloud lake. Writing poetry is my passion. It expresses my life, the ups and downs, the sadness and joys, the beauty and the ugliness in which we are all immersed. It is in my poetry that you will find ‘me’. In my writing I travel through the stages of a long life, all its highs and lows, its fun and frustration. Recently I new turn - I've resumed student life by enrolling in my MA (Writing and Literature) at Deakin University. Just as important, if not more so, I write and rewrite so that my poetry can reach out and touch as many lives as possible.

5 thoughts on “2nd draft Shouting out into empty … better but …”

  1. Lovely!

    Love the “draft style”.
    Done on purpose? Trying to show how it works while writing? (…)
    It seems you haven’t finished it, yet… Have you?
    Very musical, this poem of yours… Are you into “composing”?

    Too many questions, ha? I’m still at the age of 3, going on 43!

    Love the picture! Works perfect on this!
    (Is it yours, too? Could be…)

    Congrats! Keep on doing the GOOD work… meaning.. the lovely poetry… beyond work…beyond anything…
    🙂

    Celeste

    1. It’s been a long time since you kind comments. Life helping my autistic grandson find his feet took its toll and my time. Then another bout of depression … only just emerging. Your comments help ground me.

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